No one reads this anyway....

ladybabymama
Don't be so mean about poor little Kriss. He is sad because he has no soft woman to hold his hand and cuddle him. So he was crying and Bobby Joe is showing him that it is very fun to be a boy and not need to be with a girl in a mommy/baby sort of way. So bobby is doing a good thing.
It is possible to be friends with females in a more grown up way that is about thinking and talking and studying and sharing ideas and problem solving. That is how it is with my friends and family. Yet we enjoy the sensual and soft and pleasant life as well. Not all the time, but enough. We like adventures and quests and challenges.
So, as always, there is evolution happening all around.. I am going to sleep now, for a bit.

useriscrazyer.helper
I gave him everything I had, and I messed it up. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but yet I refused to listen to myself. I am smarter now because of what I have done and have learned what I have done. Now he does not want to have me come over or anything. It's OVER.

ladybabymama
You are working against your own self.

useriscrazyer.helper
I ENVY Kriss for his girl leaving him, and he now has Bobby to comfort him. I Envy Him.
I am very jealous of him. I wish his girl was here in another room so I could go to her and be with her. Then he would know of my pain and sorrow.

ladybabymama
OK

useriscrazyer.helper
If he really was sad, and if what you said was true, I feel for him now. But I still envy him.
Loser?

ladybabymama
lol

useriscrazyer.helper
that's not funny.

ladybabymama
well, if you think about it a bit ...

useriscrazyer.helper
I'm am a great man, and one day I will have my chance to show everyone who I can be.
I'm just biding my time.

ladybabymama
Well, you have to be great all around, not just in one area.

useriscrazyer.helper
I will be.

ladybabymama
well, you are not being so great right now
why do I bother?

useriscrazyer.helper
A person can only be pushed so far, before he goes in the direction he needs to go in. sometimes it's in the right direction, and sometimes, it's in the wrong direction. I will not be going in the wrong direction, but the ultimate direction, just sitting, learning, and biding my time.

ladybabymama
you could be developing your social skills a bit...

useriscrazyer.helper
I realize I will only live one time, I will make my time well spent here on Earth.
I'm still young, I have plenty of time.
Is that a question? lol

ladybabymama
Yeah moping about Bobby Joe is a great use of your time...I"m sorry

useriscrazyer.helper
I'm not Moping about Bobby, I've learned a great deal of what was of our relationship.

ladybabymama
Maybe you have nothing more to learn from that relationship?

useriscrazyer.helper
I'm going over or reviewing what has or what was.
It was my fault.
I don't have anything else to learn about. It's officially over as of today.

ladybabymama
Sometimes we outgrow things and our inner self makes a way out of it for us.

useriscrazyer.helper
Lucy, Bobby, Karen, and Wade were in the Kitchen, and they talked about us. I was in there, until I couldn't take it anymore. And I left, after I left, they continued talking. There were nice things said, and there were bad things said, etc. etc.

ladybabymama
about you and Bobby?

useriscrazyer.helper
About Me and Bobby.... The Meeting was manifested because of the three fights me and Kriss had, we wanted to make contact with each other, but we never hurt each other, I held my ground, and he held his, he threw punches, and I defended. I was the one who Hated or hates Kriss, but as I wrote in the above texts, I envy Kriss. and in a way, me and him are alike.

ladybabymama
you are.

useriscrazyer.helper
Strong words and speech were exchanged, that's about it, and he threw punches, and I didn't get hurt, I am very proud of myself for being able to stand up for what I thought I was fighting for.
It was about jealousy, loss of love, doing right, and doing wrong, needing others, and very extreme things on a silent level.

ladybabymama
Well if you could get through whatever is bringing up these feelings, you will gain in wisdom. and gain allies. And boost your charisma levels.
Also it is like losing the favor of your father to a lesser being.
the little brother
Believe me I know this one very well.
I have totally been where you are at right now.
When my father died I got nothing, my sisters and brothers did, because they consider me incompetent or something to that effect.
But I have my Inner Treasure.

useriscrazyer.helper
I am smarter now, I am stronger now, than I was yesterday. I have learned much. Bu I fear there is to be much more hardship in life, because I don't know everything, and I have to keep pushing forward to become better.

ladybabymama
There is always hardship but when you gain your soul back, you will be serene and confident in your abilities. Believe me.
And you will never know EVERYTHING but you will be able to find it when you need it.

useriscrazyer.helper
I could do so much with money, money to me, is like GOLD. I will end up getting a high paying job one day, and make much money. But when I do, I feel there will be even an end to that as well, once I get it, I will have nothing else to dream about or reach for. once I get enough money, that it. I will have the clothess I want, the Food I want to eat, The Equipment I need, and the support I need, my life will be complete, ...
ladybabymama
No. It will not. Those things do not satisfy. What you want is true mastery..

useriscrazyer.helper
That's why I am biding my time now. I am waiting.

ladybabymama
If you look at he world around you you will see that money means nothing.
There are things money cannot buy and they are most precious.

useriscrazyer.helper
I understand that. I do. I understand.

ladybabymama
More precious than anything.
Understanding is the beginning of wisdom.

useriscrazyer.helper
I know, it's the thing that I lacked while in the relationship with Bobby, if I had that, I would have known better to be a better person with him, and treated him better.
Money had nothing to do with it. It was within myself.

ladybabymama
well you know it is never too late for anything. Remember we are dwelling in eternity, here.

useriscrazyer.helper
Human Knowledge.

ladybabymama
Which of course begins with Self-knowledge.

useriscrazyer.helper
Know thy self.

ladybabymama
Which is why yo love bobby so. he is a mirror of what you love in yourself.

useriscrazyer.helper
That saying is in a movie called The Matrix. when he went to visit the Oracle there was a sign over his head when he entered her kitchen in the movie, She said to him, do you know what that means, he said what? She says it's latin for Know Thy Self.

ladybabymama
But the more you come to know and love yourself the more mirrors you will have to love.

useriscrazyer.helper
I love Bobby, because he lacks knowledge, he could use some help. So I had seen that, and I helped... He has Changed a lot because of me. A lot.

ladybabymama
It was the sign over the door at the temple of Delphi

useriscrazyer.helper
I've seen a glimpse of it today. but he is still Bobby.

ladybabymama
each person has his own path and it is theirs alone.
Your path is yours alone and Bobby's is his alone.
We walk beside each other for a time, that's all.
And we always meet up again
Some roads go on forever, though.

useriscrazyer.helper
Yes, you are correct, I just looked it up, but I saw what you were talking about, even though I didn't know what you were talking about, I typed The Matrix, Know Thyself in Google, and in the first result it has was your talking about, but like I said, I learned and heard about that, from a Movie called, The Matrix.

ladybabymama
I saw that movie. All movies and books, etc, are reflections of a great Reality.

useriscrazyer.helper
take a glimpse, see ... http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&source=hp&q=the+matrix+know+thyself&cts=1266894334408&aq=0&aqi=g1&oq=The+matrix+Know+
Those are my search results, and I clicked on the first result. The Temple Of Delphi is in there too.

ladybabymama
There are many references to classic knowledge in the "Matrix"
that's why they are so popular, the matrix movies.
They resonate with a truth in many ways.
My objection to the Matrix is the idea that there are only two choices, the red pill, or the blue pill. There are other choices.
You don't really know WHO I am do you?

useriscrazyer.helper
GOT IT.
Take a look.
I used Screen Hunter, and I hunted it down in my movie, The Matrix.

ladybabymama
what do I open it with?
I found the wikipedia article...

useriscrazyer.helper
I am going to put it online so you don't have to download it, you can right click it and choose Save image if you want to keep it, but I'm going to put it online, One sec.
Tell me if this works, http://www.mediafire.com/imageview.php?quickkey=u0ljavj5znf&thumb=4
See...?

ladybabymama
Oh yeah, I remember that part. LOL

useriscrazyer.helper
LOL, I'm so cool.

ladybabymama
You really ARE!!

useriscrazyer.helper
or should I say, resourceful.

ladybabymama
See that's why I love you so much you are a good mirror for me.
You are very resource-full!

useriscrazyer.helper
lol

ladybabymama
Baby, you're a rich man!!

useriscrazyer.helper
I am. but I don't have anyone to share it with, you have a mac,
I used to share all my treasures and knowledge with bobby, but....

ladybabymama
Well you can share PC stuff with me and I will share Mac stuff with you.

useriscrazyer.helper
Guess how many movies he has now because of me?
mac and PC are not compatable.

ladybabymama
So, see? yo ubenefitted his life.

useriscrazyer.helper
we can share Images and Pictures, but not software.
unbenefitted?

ladybabymama
Uh, I think it's not as hard as you might think.
No...you benefitted
missed the space bar, there

useriscrazyer.helper
O, benefitted, O I see it now, sorry... I didn't see it, I understand now... Yeah, I did, ...

ladybabymama
Anyway I can scarcely manage the software I already have

useriscrazyer.helper
I gave him software to copy movies, music, and he will NEVER have to buy another piece of media ever again. If someone has it, he can copy it, He is a Copy Cat. lol...

ladybabymama
I can't even figure out how to use flash and I did the tutorials and everything

useriscrazyer.helper
Flash?
What Tutorials did you do?

ladybabymama
Lots of people remember me fondly because I enhanced their lives.
The ones that there were to do. I only got to the third one and I had brainfreeze.
Some stuff is very hard for me to learn even though I want to.
It's frustrating

useriscrazyer.helper
I just hope he tells others of where or who taught him. It's not fucking free to have unlimited media, or to be able to borow a DVD and be able to by pass the CSS Encripted DVDs. He's borrowing Buffy the vampire slayer from #4, and he is able to keep that season of buffy because of the Software I gave him.

ladybabymama
So, asshole, you borrowed it from PIRATE BAY!! LOL

useriscrazyer.helper
I stay away from Flash, I can convert AVI Video Files to Flash, SWF and FLV, I can download YouTube Videos to my comptuer so I may keep them, I can play the SWF and FLV Video files, but I refuse to code and make Flash Content. I can, but don't

ladybabymama
All I want to do is make moving pictures
sigh
my hair smells really nice right now.

useriscrazyer.helper
no, I didn't. I downloaded it from there, they gave me serial number and Cracks to crack the activation process, but I gave it to him, and cracked it for him, so he didn't have to pay for shit. the software I have is 1,000's of dollars, the software he has is only a fraction of what I have, he only has DVD Rippers, DVD makers, CD Rippers, and that's about it, and some custome software I made myself for his games, he presses a button and it cheets for him, it types in the cheat codes and stuff...
MOVING PICTURES?

ladybabymama
uh...pictures which move? and tell a story.
Or dance?

useriscrazyer.helper
Animated GIFS?
Like this.. One sec...

ladybabymama
no, more than that
Remember, I am an artist, not a scientist. I do use science for my art, however.
I mean, the pigments for my oil paints were developed by the alchemists.
The scientific mind produced the guitar I strum when i sing songs.

useriscrazyer.helper
So you want to show people your art work with only showing one box but show all your work one at a time ...? right?
A Picture Slideshow? that would be easier.

ladybabymama
No, take or make elements which move, like in a cartoon?

useriscrazyer.helper
Here, take a look at an Animated GIF. http://www.mediafire.com/imageview.php?quickkey=fzyihtmgtzx&thumb=4

ladybabymama
I can do slideshows already. I have Powerpoint.

useriscrazyer.helper
You want to make cartoons?

ladybabymama
LOL!!!ou ARE a cartoon!! That's so cute!!

useriscrazyer.helper
lol, ...

ladybabymama
I want a camera like that!! that is sooo coool!

useriscrazyer.helper
MediaFire.com

ladybabymama
?

useriscrazyer.helper
Its a Web Cam attched to my computer, I used a Free program called YAW Cam, and I used a $300 program to capture and convert it to GIF.

ladybabymama
yike!!
My head hurts

useriscrazyer.helper
The YAW Cam is the software where I came over to your room that one day, and typed My IP and Port into your web browser to stream my web cam to your computer FREE. Remember, and camtasia studio is a $300 piece of software that can record your computer screen, and produce the video in ANY format.

ladybabymama
I like you better than my family. We are not ducks and maybe not swans. Maybe we are gooses?
My mind is not getting any traction on the camera issue, somehow.

useriscrazyer.helper
So what is it that you want to do, not cartoons right, Moving Pictures of some kind, but I'm not clear on what you want to do exactly.
give me a link of what you saw, and I will tell you if I can help doing it, or not.

ladybabymama
me neither. I never really know ahead of time. I just like learning how things work and playing with them to see what they do?
what I see is in my mind. I don't know how to make that link,which is why I want to learn flash.
does that make ANY sense??

useriscrazyer.helper
yeah, I guess.

ladybabymama
sorry
well at least I can see it in my head. My mom always wants to know what it is like inside my head,.

useriscrazyer.helper
You have what for a Media Player, you have only Quicktime, right?

ladybabymama
windows too, I think
brb gotta poop

useriscrazyer.helper
Windows Media Files, WMV and WMA?

ladybabymama
brb

useriscrazyer.helper
k.

ladybabymama
ahhhh!!
I fucking love shitting

useriscrazyer.helper
Umm, huh...?

ladybabymama
TMI, I know,what ev

useriscrazyer.helper
I like it too, but I don't love it, ...

ladybabymama
I'm looking in my applications.

useriscrazyer.helper
k.

ladybabymama
It feels really good.

useriscrazyer.helper
I know.

ladybabymama
windows media player, vlc and quicktime

useriscrazyer.helper
You have VLC media Player?

ladybabymama
Besides, Most of the people I know aren't that savvy about media stuff and probably only have quicktime.

useriscrazyer.helper
Windows Media Player? HOW? How the hell is that possible, you have a Mac for Gods sake.

ladybabymama
Duh,you installed it on here.

useriscrazyer.helper
I did?

ladybabymama
I have all sores of Windows stuff.
Microsoft office, word, etc.

useriscrazyer.helper
Umm, but it doesn't work, .... right?

ladybabymama
what? It all works
Don't underestimate the power of the mac.
You don't remember installing vlc?
*sigh*
I even have something on here called "Remote Desktop Connection"...

useriscrazyer.helper
lol, .. I guess it's all good, k... that's nice then... but all you need now is some new Movies... I have plenty of them, since I'm not able to visit bobby anymore, On his request, I could treat you. Or maybe you don't really care, and you don't want any movies, ....

ladybabymama
I want to make movies

useriscrazyer.helper
yeah, I know...
What Kind Of Movies Do You Want To Make?

ladybabymama
I will find a way. I lent my brother my camera, too. Porn. LOL
Different kinds

useriscrazyer.helper
PORN !!!!! ???? OMG Lady...

ladybabymama
LOLOLOL
yeah
or music videos

useriscrazyer.helper
You want people to see you naked...? Visit Cam4, it's free. you can broadcast your ass off, and get many many viewers to view your cam. you need a web cam though, which I'd recommend.

ladybabymama
no, I am talking about art. Stories.
I don't need people to see me naked.
I only do that in California.

useriscrazyer.helper
Art...? Stories...? Ok... so you want to turn your Art, and Stories into Movies? That's so damn easy, you said you had Power point, what's stopping you?

ladybabymama
Ok forget it. Powerpoint is not movies it is slideshows
And I want to make up new stories
Forget it I will crawl back under my bed now with my sketchbook and a flashlight.
Better yet I will turn out the lights and watch the movies behind my eyes.

useriscrazyer.helper
Ok.. but that's as far as your going to get if all you want to do is talk and show your art and do stories, your talking about Animating and Drawing Animated Scenes like cartoons on your computer, if all you wanted to do was just show your Art work and tell stories, you could just stick with Power Point or whatever...

ladybabymama
I gave Rami a powerpoint I did

useriscrazyer.helper
Umm, okay...

ladybabymama
Well, you are right. It's just that the stuff in my head moves.

useriscrazyer.helper
how did you give her a powerpoint, lol....

ladybabymama
I printed it out.
On paper.
I have the files

useriscrazyer.helper
YEAY, I GOT Kung Fu Season 1 and 2 Now YEAY... it took me almost 24 hours to get 2 seasons, YEAY... do you know about Kung Fu? with David Carradine?

ladybabymama
duh
yes grasshopper

useriscrazyer.helper
Do you know that he teaches things in the shows, and that it's not just about Fighting?

ladybabymama
double duh
I love that show
It is one of my favorites ever!!
I watched it before you were born. LOL

useriscrazyer.helper
I LOVE THOSE SHOWS, I used to watch them everyday when they were on TV. NOW I HAVE Season 1 AND 2, should I download Season 3, or should I stop and just be thankful for what I have now, ... Season 1 is 1972, and Season 2 is 1973, and season 3 is 1974, I have 1 and 2. YEAY !!!!!! OMG, Thank We The People for 1TB external Hard Drives, AWESOME...
I kinda figured you did...

ladybabymama
As a matter of fact I watched it last winter over at Ben's

useriscrazyer.helper
Only if my computer could output S Video, to my new 27" COLOR TV... It outputs HDMI, so I will be stuck watching them on my 20" LCD Monitor, Oh Well... Until I get that device I want, wanna see what I wanna get, ...?
Cool, ...

ladybabymama
you can't watch on your new tv?
oh well
I use those stories a lot from that show
The stories are the same no matter what you view them on.
And the stories are what counts

useriscrazyer.helper
No because they are in AVI Video File Format, and the only way I could watch them on the TV is to burn them to DVD, but I don't have ANY MORE DVD R's, I burned all them so I'd have some movies to watch on my new DVD player and My new TV, i got from the garbage, it's a very nice tv, it looks brand new, I fixed it, it had NO power cord, and I gave it one, I stoll a cord or cut a cord from another smaller less advanced tv, and gave it to this 27 inch Tv that lets you hook up S video and A/V Composite Video Cords to it... I can not watch cable on it, because it has no hookup for Coaxial cable. I'd have to hook up a VCR to it...
ladybabymama
ah

useriscrazyer.helper
I can watch them. I will watch them.

ladybabymama
good enough, then

useriscrazyer.helper
yep.

ladybabymama
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BpzgxfqAERg

useriscrazyer.helper
Everyone on there says Fake, why are they saying it's fake, I don't understand the video.
hello?
BUZZ!!!

ladybabymama
??

useriscrazyer.helper
Did you read the comments? did you watch the video, Why are they saying it's fake, the withdrawal from not being able to play World or Warcraft is fake?
I don't understand the video.

ladybabymama
my sister did shit like this to my brother

useriscrazyer.helper
Did what?

ladybabymama
taped him having major hissy fits.
I'm glad no one filmed me!!!
lol

useriscrazyer.helper
lol... it's some crazy stuff, I'm pretty bad too I guess... He's young, ... so it doesn't seem too bad.

ladybabymama
I've had worse fits than this one.

useriscrazyer.helper
lol, I could imagine... I've seen what you do when your told you have mail and there's no mail... lol

ladybabymama
She did this whole fake radio called Alan's rage. The rage was real, but she pretendrd to be a reporter..
oh yeah!!
I got hauled to the slammer for shit like that.

useriscrazyer.helper
I too. It's called the Harbor.

ladybabymama
harbor?
http://allgolden.blogspot.com/2010/02/ladybabymama-dont-be-so-mean-about-poor.html

useriscrazyer.helper
The Harbor. You Eat, Sleep, school, and take meds, get needles if you are out of control, and stay in a concrete room. The Harbor.
Somthing similar to that, is up here, it's called Astor.
Yes, I'm a very very bad little boy.

ladybabymama
Ah, I was lucky. The cops said the bitch desreved what she got.

useriscrazyer.helper
I'm allot different today than I was a long time ago.

ladybabymama
I.m the same, only handle it better. Sometimes. LOL

useriscrazyer.helper
I scratched up my face, I had scratch marks all up and down my face... yes..
Very Disturbing.

ladybabymama
well I know it.

useriscrazyer.helper
I used to write and carve words in my arm. I used to....

ladybabymama
I hit myself a few times but mostly I wanted to hurt other people. Kill them, mostly.
I did bitch slap my mom.

useriscrazyer.helper
I used to hit myself too. I would slam myself into walls and stuff... If i'm capable of harming myself that much, how much pain could I cause to others, MUCH.
I used to hold my head with my hand and act like another person beating myself up.... the kind of shit you see Jim Carrey do in the movie Liar Liar.
Liar Liar wasn't out back then.

ladybabymama
Now I am using my charisma and other magical abilities instead of brute force. It takes less energy.
Yeah, I know. The war of the
selves

useriscrazyer.helper
When I scratched my face up, I was forced to go to school like that. Everyone was very disturbed, and I had to answer many questions of why I did what I did to myself, it's the worse thing I have ever did to myself.

ladybabymama
first I got them to the point where the fighting was strictly verbal.

useriscrazyer.helper
Middle School.

ladybabymama
It's not uncommon, that,
This world encouraged self hatred on the one hand and is horrified by it onthe other hand.

useriscrazyer.helper
It's not normal, it's abnormal that someone would scratch up there face... I am very ashamed of myself for doing something like that to myself....

ladybabymama
Not "normal" but not uncommon. anyway most people punish themselves in other more subtle ways.

useriscrazyer.helper
It's done and over, it's been a while now since then.
I know they do.

ladybabymama
now youre using Bobby Joe to beat yourself up.And Kriss

useriscrazyer.helper
Umm, yeah, I guess, but let me think about that for a min, and I'll tell you if it's true, or if I see that or not..

ladybabymama
It's a thought...
when I love myself, everyone loves me.
when I hate myself I have no friends.
When I love myself I see the good in everyone.
0When I hate myself everyone is trying to fuck me over.

useriscrazyer.helper
How my relationship went with him, I didn't try my hardest, and I refused to do better, and not call him names and stuff. I put him down and I cheated on him. I had somthing really good, and It was too good for me, so I wanted or felt I needed more, I was selfish, ... I was greedy, So I guess me keeping a realization of the fact of what or how the relationship went and ended, is me beating myself up, yep.

ladybabymama
Maybe you did your best.

useriscrazyer.helper
I did my best, but I could do better now. because I've learned from what I've done and the consequences of my actions. but I have indeed or I did Indeed do my best, as far as what I thought or knew at that time. yep.

ladybabymama
You are putting yourself down because of how it went in that relationship.
Maybe you were just being true to yourself.
Maybe you need to be in a relationship with someone who is fine with the truth of you.

useriscrazyer.helper
I guess there's a key concept to realize here, A Person can do therir best, but a person can never be the best, people can never do their best, they will or they can always do better.

ladybabymama
Bobby joe is a drama queen. I'm sorry.

useriscrazyer.helper
He is, it's true.

ladybabymama
But you make yourself out to be the bad guy and to me you are the good guy
I call Bobby Joe "Wormtongue because he poisoned your mind.
I could see it from the begining.
And then there is the concept of "perfect for this purpose" like a hammer for a nail, or a keyboard for a pc etc.
Something that doesn't fit one place may be "perfect" in another
Someday you will see who your true friend is.

meanwhile......
See you're all up in somebody's grill if they don't like you and if they do like you they are retarded or trivial.Oh well,I've done that too.